I Have Learned

I've learned -
that you cannot make someone love you.
All you can do is be someone who can be loved.
The rest is up to them.

I've learned -
that no matter how much I care,
some people just don't care back.

I've learned -
that it takes years to build up trust,
and only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned -
that it's not what you have in your life
but who you have in your life that counts.

I've learned -
that you can get by on charm
for about fifteen minutes.
After that, you'd better know something.

I've learned -
that you shouldn't compare
yourself to the best others can do.
but to the best you can do.

I've learned -
that it's not what happens to people
that's important. It's what they do about it.

I've learned -
that you can do something in an instant
that will give you heartache for life.

I've learned -
that no matter how thin you slice it,
there are always two sides.

I've learned -
that it's taking me a long time
to become the person I want to be.

I've learned -
that it's a lot easier
to react than it is to think.

I've learned -
that you should always leave
loved ones with loving words.
It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned -
that you can keep going
long after you think you can't.

I've learned -
that we are responsible for what we do,
no matter how we feel.

I've learned -
that either you control your attitude
or it controls you.

I've learned -
that regardless of how hot and steamy
a relationship is at first,
the passion fades and there had better be
something else to take its place.

I've learned -
that heroes are the people
who do what has to be done
when it needs to be done,
regardless of the consequences.

I've learned -
that learning to forgive takes practice.

I've learned -
that there are people who love you dearly,
but just don't know how to show it.

I've learned -
that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I've learned -
that my best friend and I can do anything
or nothing and have the best time.

I've learned -
that sometimes the people you expect
to kick you when you're down
will be the ones to help you get back up.

I've learned -
that sometimes when I'm angry
I have the right to be angry,
but that doesn't give me
the right to be cruel.

I've learned -
that true friendship continues to grow,
even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.

I've learned -
that just because someone doesn't love you
the way you want them to doesn't mean
they don't love you with all they have.

I've learned -
that maturity has more to do with
what types of experiences you've had
and what you've learned from them
and less to do with how many
birthdays you've celebrated.

I've learned -
that you should never tell a child
their dreams are unlikely or outlandish.
Few things are more humiliating, and
what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

I've learned -
that your family won't always
be there for you. It may seem funny,
but people you aren't related to
can take care of you and love you
and teach you to trust people again.
Families aren't biological.

I've learned -
that no matter how good a friend is,
they're going to hurt you
every once in a while
and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned -
that it isn't always enough
to be forgiven by others.
Sometimes you have to learn
to forgive yourself.

I've learned -
that no matter how bad
your heart is broken
the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I've learned -
that our background and circumstances
may have influenced who we are,
but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned -
that sometimes when my friends fight,
I'm forced to choose sides
even when I don't want to.

I've learned -
that just because two people argue,
it doesn't mean they don't love each other
And just because they don't argue,
it doesn't mean they do.

I've learned -
that sometimes you have to put
the individual ahead of their actions.

I've learned -
that we don't have to change friends
if we understand that friends change.

I've learned -
that you shouldn't be so
eager to find out a secret.
It could change your life forever.

I've learned -
that two people can look
at the exact same thing
and see something totally different.

I've learned -
that no matter how you try to protect
your children, they will eventually get hurt
and you will hurt in the process.

I've learned -
that there are many ways of falling
and staying in love.

I've learned -
that no matter the consequences,
those who are honest with themselves
get farther in life.

I've learned -
that no matter how many friends you have,
if you are their pillar you will feel lonely
and lost at the times you need them most.

I've learned -
that your life can be changed
in a matter of hours
by people who don't even know you.

I've learned -
that even when you think
you have no more to give,
when a friend cries out to you,
you will find the strength to help.

I've learned -
that writing, as well as talking,
can ease emotional pains.

I've learned -
that the paradigm we live in
is not all that is offered to us.

I've learned -
that credentials on the wall
do not make you a decent human being.

I've learned -
that the people you care most about in life
are taken from you too soon.

I've learned -
that although the word “love”
can have many different meanings,
it loses value when overly used.

I've learned -
that it's hard to determine
where to draw the line
between being nice and
not hurting people's feelings
and standing up for what you believe

by Kathy Kane Hansen